Realization of the Future

Today I took my final for my summer class. I did not do as well as I would of hoped, but when I was sitting down to one last beer between me and my fellow studians from LSU, I realized that I am now in the final countdown to my departure from Louisiana; the place I have called home for the past 10 years. Being here for half of my short life, I would now say I call Louisiana my home. This was not realized until just now considering everyone here thinks of me to be from Oklahoma.

Talking about random topics over beer with people I have come to know well over the past year made me realize just how much I will miss this place. No more late nights listening to Marcelle's weird music and building models. No more doing terrible at flag football with my co-workers, although we were champions... Now I must anxiously await meeting the new people I will spend all my time with, learning new things about each other as the deliriousness sets in from lack of sleep...unfortunately the model building until late will continue. My only hope is that on the first day I am told that my shoes are cute by another mysterious girl.

For tonight all I can do is prepare myself for the packed schedule and stress of the next three weeks. As I get the packing tape out and open my first box, letting dust fly and smelling that o so familiar smell which lets me know that soon I will call another place home; just as I did last summer and two summers before; I hope that my experience in Houston is as good as my past experiences in Louisiana have been. There is a certain feeling that I have felt with this move that has not been felt since I moved from my parent's house, and that is of a sense of permanence. I can finally settle, if for only a little while, settle somewhere. I will also be able to settle with someone I love which is considerably different than meeting my current roomates the first day I unloaded my belongings.

I dread the next three weeks of packing and taping, running out of boxes and finding more. I dread that sweat running down my legs as I load the truck and driving away from my school. To further add to my emotions, I will drive through my true home of Lafayette which contains my second family...my very best friends and as far as I know holds more character in one pinky than the entire state of Texas. Although I will be making many trips back, I know it will not be the same. I dread the process of getting my new home connected to the world, but am looking forward to making this home my own. I dread having to schedule new classes with new people and finding a new job with new customs. I do however get excited when I think of the opportunities Houston has to offer and things I can accomplish. I know that come Christmas I will feel settled and love my new home; and will be looking forward to the new step brought forth in my life. Until then all I can do is fill my home with Fleur de Lis's until it feels just right.

xo,
Nikki

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something to nibble on...